Ten wonderfully easy ways to talk yourself to awesome
We all know the power of words. Sticks and stones may break by bones but words will never harm me is mere wishful thinking, bones can heal, the wound of a misthought word may not. We teach our children to be careful how they phrase things, to be gentle in their honesty.
But, and there is always a but, how often do we consider how we use our language in relation to ourselves? I am somewhat overweight and loosing a stone or even two would do me no harm at all. The other day I referred to myself as fat. My twin teenage daughters were horrified. “You’re not fat” the protested. I stopped to think. I am overweight, but fat is (whether you agree or not) a negative term, overweight is a statement of fact. I was choosing the negative term.
So I sat down and thought up a list of phrases that we often use in referring to ourselves and tried to turn them around. This is what I came up with.
- I can’t do that = I don’t know how to do that (yet)
- I’m not really a completer finisher = I have great ideas and I welcome support to see them through
- I’ll never change = I haven’t changed yet but I can
- Nobody wants to hear what I have to say = I wonder who would want to hear what I have to say
- Who would buy from me??? = Who would buy from me and where can I find them?
- I’ll never be as good as Jim = At what? Guess what Jim isn’t perfect either
- I’m terrified I’ll make a complete mess of it = Everybody is terrified they will make a complete mess of it – but how often do they?
- I’ll never be able to do X = Nobody can do everything. I can do Y pretty darn well.
- I am a crap parent = I am a human being and my little human beings are doing okay too
- I’ll never get this right (read “perfect”) = Sometimes good enough for purpose is good enough
There are some phrases in the English language that are very powerful. Personally I think the most powerful is
“I don’t know”
We can’t know how to do everything. We weren’t born fully able to converse, we had to learn, we weren’t born able to drive, we had to learn. Even Einstein and Hawkings went to school……
Not knowing something is merely the message that you either need to learn how or find somebody who already does. YOU will be that somebody for somebody else. So stop the negative talk and start appreciating what a tremendous human being you are. And remember …..
Because that is how we learn.
Love Gillie x